Trusting God (Part 2): When Loneliness Threatens to Overwhelm

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Have you ever felt lonely? I mean, really lonely? Like that aching, gnawing feeling that you are all alone in this world and that there is no one and nothing to satisfy. Or the feeling that you are alone in the midst of a sea of other faces and you don’t really matter all that much.

Shortly after moving out of my parents’ house post-graduation and obtaining a job, I found myself feeling incredibly lonely – but, not the kind of lonely that comes from living alone or not being able to spend time with my friends. No, this was the kind of lonely that comes from desiring to have the closeness that comes with being in a romantic relationship, but presently not being in that state. Not that I have a lot of experience with romantic relationships, but like most people, I have a desire for those things. A desire to love and be loved, to hold hands and whisper words of affection in another’s ear, to talk about life and dream for the future.

Over the past seven months, I have been learning a lot about what it means to trust the Lord in this particular area of my life. And it has not been easy – there have been joys, hurts, frustrations, and disappointments. The desire I have for the Lord to place a man in my life is a dream that is still left undone. And it is so easy to get discouraged and to give into the feelings of loneliness and be overwhelmed by them, forgetting that there is more to life than romance and flowers and affectionate gestures. No, indeed there is a lot more to life than those things.

For example, in my case, I still have great friendships and am working on building more. In addition, I have a wonderful family who loves me and supports me. I have two jobs, which though they are tiring, provide me with adequate income to meet my financial needs and also are enabling me to stretch my abilities and grow as I prepare for whatever the Lord may lead me to do in the future. I have an amazing church family who encourages me and challenges me in my faith. I have opportunities to serve others, whether it be encouraging my friends, or playing keyboard on the worship team at my church, or teaching children’s church. Most importantly, I am a daughter of the King and He has gone to great lengths to love, forgive and redeem me. He has amazing plans for my life, even when I don’t see it.

At the same time, even though my life is full of good things, my heart still has longings. I still desire the close companionship of a man. I still have a desire to be a wife. And my heart still feels as if that is something that is missing in my life. But, I cannot look to those things as the source of my hope.

It’s hard because I know that God has created me to have those desires. It is completely natural to feel those things. And so, I find myself saying “Lord, I know that you have put these desires on my heart. I know that you have a plan in all this. But, won’t You do something about it?” And God’s response is “Jess, you just have to trust Me.”

Over and over again, God simply asks me to trust Him, and put my hope solely in Him. And that is what He asks of each of us, no matter what situation we happen to be in, or how lonely we feel.

The description of Psalm 102 is “a prayer of one overwhelmed with trouble, pouring out problems before the Lord.” I think this is applicable to what I have been saying. In verse 7, the psalmist says “I lie awake, lonely as a solitary bird on the roof” (NLT). The surrounding context is of the psalmist pouring out his despair and discouragement over his situation. But, in verse 12, the psalm takes a different turn. It says “But you, O Lord, will sit on your throne forever. Your fame will endure to every generation.” Verses 25-27 say, “Long ago you laid the foundation of the earth and made the heavens with your hands. They will perish, but you will remain forever; they will wear out like old clothing. You will change them like a garment and discard them. But you are always the same; you will live forever.”

The fact is that even when we feel like a “lonely solitary bird,” God is still seated on His throne and He is still working out His glorious plans. We can trust that even when friends drift away, or we move to different stages of life, or our dreams are left undone, and loneliness threatens to overwhelm us, God is still sovereign. He is still good. And He has wonderful plans for us.

So, on this Valentine’s Day, reject the temptation to find your hope in another person or in earthly things. Instead, cling to the hope found in Christ – He has won the ultimate victory and He is seated on the throne in all glory and majesty! He will never leave you or reject you. God has gone to great lengths to demonstrate His love for you and He has plans for your good. You can trust Him!

(Trusting God: Part 3)

Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright ©1996, 2004, 2007, 2013, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.